USC Ch.0: It's Time.

Disclaimer: this post is about moving to college. It has, like, 3% to do with what this blog should really be about. Oh well. Thank you for reading.

12:20am, Singapore Time. Now listening to: Agniratha, Imerial Capital from Xenoblade Chronicles OST. Fits my current mood remarkably well - quiet, melancholic, somewhat contemplative, bursts of resolve in the occasional cresecendo.

7 years -- that's how long I've been here in the Lion City. (Approximately. Exactly 7 years ago I was some fat kid in Malaysia, preparing for my primary school finals by binge reading the DBZ final saga.) I came in full of impressions about how artistically talented I was, how I would be a lone wolf, better than everyone else and (consequentially) being apart from them, working in my own peace and quiet.

Year after year, I've had my ass handed to me. First -- getting a dose of the isolation I'd set myself up for, as the uptight teacher's pet. And then -- having my lack of general knowledge mercilessly wrecked by debater after debater, noobs and veterans alike. Finding myself in positions for which I had none of the charisma required -- stage actor, sergeant major. All this, after an entire childhood spent lolling around in a massive house like a pig, just strikes me as surreal.

I don't feel like I've even changed at all, in a fundamental sense. After so many history essays, army songs, MUN conferences, impromptu debate tournaments -- I still dream an artist's dream. That I'll make it to the screens someday. Or bust out my own videogame with a groundbreaking philosophy. That I'll always have the need to create, more than anything else.

But I suppose that changes can show in the subtlest of ways, even within my own artwork. Yesterday, I re-read all 30+ episodes of my comic series, It's A Small World / Into The Cyber World (yeah I went as far as a sequel). And the whole thing is absolutely atrocious -- rubbish plot full of violently sharp plot twists, epically poor drawing techniques (my archer shot actual arrow-shaped arrows, as in "-> -> ->"), and of course, nonsensical dialogue (there's random splashes of Chinese everywhere!). I suppose the only saving grace is that the characters are shaped like those little Ribena mascot guys, which is nice.

I guess I've matured. And in more ways than being able to not make a piece of trash plot -- at least, I'm sure that I make a much more engaging friend today than I ever did as an asocial cartoonist kid.

I'd like to finish off on a cooler note, but it's 1:30am sharp and my mind is honestly drawing a blank. Pity. So to randomly jump topics -- all the best to me in the School of Trojans, City of Angels. Man, I'm still so glad I got into the very best option for my career plans -- a school with equally competent programmers, animators and filmmakers, all living in an innovative culture and located smack in the middle of entertainment central. USC, we're gonna have a good time.

Goodbye, Singapore -- and Fight On.

#longpost #sadness #USC